Step Up Men – Don’t Hide Behind the #MeToo “movement”​. We Must Champion Women!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Have you heard this, or something like this — “I am not going to take a chance and support or mentor women in the workplace, because you never know, she could come back years later and accuse me of sexual harassment and there goes my career!”

Are you kidding me? This is one of the most backwards statements I have ever heard of!

What Is #MeToo and Does that Impact Me as Male Leader?

So what is#MeToo? I boil it down to an upward swell of women AND men who are done with being sexually harassed and abused …especially in the workplace. (Yes, men too. It has been noted that 1 in 6 men have experienced sexual abuse) #MeToo has brought this abusive behavior to the front of people’s minds and is putting the world on notice that this is not acceptable, in any situation, in any form.

So will this impact you? Yes, the world is a-changin! If you are a man that likes to leverage power and sex to control people, you are now on notice – this will absolutely impact your ability to successfully manage. (Notice I did not say “lead,” because a true LEADER would not use control or limit actions by means of abusive power.)

Be Professional…be respectful!

“But, I am Concerned that I Will Be Unfairly or Wrongly Accused”

I hear this talk from men in many circles. Did you know that there have been studies in the US, UK, and in Europe that of the accusations, only about 2% to 6%, are deemed false? Additionally, there are asterisks and caveats that point out some reports may have been mis-categorized as false when there may not be enough legal evidence to prosecute.

The best approach, be professional, don’t put yourself in a situation that could be misconstrued. Keep your physical contact to a handshake. (I know for those of us living and working in cultures that accept hugs or kisses as appropriate, this advice may be difficult) When having a 1:1 conversation, don’t lock the door or if you are able, keep the door open.

My mother has always told me – “when you wonder about the right way to act, just ask ‘would I approve of what you are saying or doing?'” I constantly ask myself – “is this ok if I were in front of my wife or daughter?”

Be Professional…be respectful!

Women Need Men as Supporters and Sponsors in the Work Place

Let’s face the facts – it is true there are more men than women in leadership positions. This is why it is an imperative that Men MUST be the Champions in leveling the playing field. We need to instill and foster a culture where women feel comfortable having men as mentors and coaches.

Did you know that it is a proven fact that companies led by women are more profitable and tend to grow faster with more sustainability. Hey, as a stock holder or investor – that’s what I want….MORE PROFIT and higher sustainability!!

Over the past 50 years, we have made great strides to reduce the inequity; in society and in the workplace. If we are not careful, this type of ignorant thinking will set all of this advancement back in time. We all need to work together to keep the momentum.

Why Do I Care About Championing Women?

You may ask what is my motivation? It’s pure and simple, I have two daughters, six nieces, and two granddaughters. I am fortunate to be married to one of the most intelligent, professional women I have ever met.

I want to help build a culture that treats them with Professionally and with Respect,afforded the same opportunities that that are afforded me, my son, nephew, and grandson.

Bottomline men – don’t use the #MeToo movement an easy excuse to not do the hard things. Think about your wife, your daughter or granddaughter and I guarantee you too will want to  Champion Women! Do not be afraid to be a mentor, coach, or sponsor to a talented up-and-coming leader.

Step Up Men!

#womeninleadership #menwhochampionwomen #walkingontheglassfloor

Jim Steinmark

Coach, Mentor or Sponsor – Which Do You Need?

 

 

You probably hear about people having an executive coach or a mentor. A term you may not be as familiar with is a sponsor. Are these different terms for the same thing or do they really serve different purposes? The answer is they are definitely different, and are all important for your career growth. Let me break it down for you.

Coach – This is a formal arrangement initiated by an individual or organization. The goal is to help you improve certain skills or handle specific areas of development. Working with a coach usually follows some type of a structured process that may involve using assessments to gauge skill level and/or collecting feedback from those you work for, with, or who report to you. The coaching relationship usually has a finite duration. At some point your goals will be achieved and the coaching contract will end.

Mentor – A mentor/mentee relationship is usually, but not always informal. Many large organizations have formal mentoring programs. When informal, the relationship may start by identifying someone you admire or want advice from, such as learning how to navigate your organization or grow your career. While a coach helps you with specific skills, a mentor may be a sounding board when confronted with situations you’re encountering for the first time, help you identify and build on your strengths, or talk with about career options. Some mentoring relationships last a lifetime while others eventually run their course. The agenda for informal mentoring is set by the individual rather than the mentor or organization.

Sponsor – A sponsor is someone at a senior level in your organization who advocates for you when you are being considered for a promotion or special project. You don’t choose a sponsor, they choose you; usually by being in a position to see your work and recognize your talent and potential. If you have a mentor who also has an executive position in your company, they may, over time turn into a sponsor.

So which do you need to maximize your carer development? All of them. At some point in your career, each of these roles can help you improve your performance, get promoted or grow your career. So take the initiative and ask for or find a coach, engage a mentor, and grow relationships with senior leaders to cultivate a sponsor.

Alexis Gladstone

The Value Of Coaching

When I started my company in 2009, one of the first things I did was to understand what I didn’t know how to do. I loved people, I could sell, I wanted to make a difference and always wanted to bring value.  All sounds great so far right? What I didn’t really know how to do was to create a company or a business that would support me in loving people, selling, making a difference and bringing value.

So the first step was knowing what I needed and then realizing I didn’t know what I didn’t know and that is where my business coach came in.  She sat me down and asked me a lot of questions, listened to my goals or dreams and together we worked together to put that in place.  Again, sounds great so far right?  Here’s the REAL truth.  You have to know how to listen to your coach.  They have the experience and expertise. If you had an athletic coach who told you to hit the ball or kick the ball or catch the ball or whatever with the ball and you thought you knew better, where do you think that would end up?  Ok not much different with a business coach.

Everything she told me to do made perfect sense, however, I already knew that, already tried that and was already to dismiss that.  Let me just say that if you asked me what type of person I don’t ever want to coach…it would be the ones that say I’ve done that already, I’ve tried that already and the rest of that nonsense.  During one of my sessions, it was decided that I would write a book.  It wasn’t necessarily my decision as it was never on my radar, but my coach suggested that since I had 30 years of “stuff” in my head, why not organize it and share it with others.  I finally agreed and she told me to have an outline, not the book itself, just an outline completed by a certain date.  I sheepishly agreed and didn’t really give it another thought.  Remember, I knew better…The date came and we were having a session and towards the end she asked me to show her the outline. It was not completed or really, it was not even started.  She was less than happy but very professional.  She didn’t say what she probably wanted to say but she did say this… “Let’s get in the car and drive for a few minutes.  Then let’s open the windows and throw all your money out, roll up the windows and leave.” I thought she had lost her mind and then she finished with “Why are you paying me all this money when you don’t do any of the work? How will your business ever get off the ground? How will people know who you are?  How will you ever make a difference or bring value?”  That was the day I realized how important a coach really is.

The truth is that coaching helps people focus on the things that are contributing to their being stuck, and then move beyond them.  I knew I was stuck in a place that I didn’t recognize and I needed someone who knew better than I did and who was totally objective to move me along. Harvey Mackay said, “Athletes and actors have long hired coaches to help prepare for a specific competition or role. But they aren’t the only ones who can benefit from expert advice. Coaches are available to help people in any field improve their “game.” You see will all need to improve our game…no matter what field that is in.

There are so many reasons to have a coach for your business. Ever think about what qualities you should look for? I put together a Slide Share about this topic.  Here are the highlights and you can go to slideshare.net- 15 Qualities You Should Look For In A Business Coach. You can check it out at https://www.slideshare.net/JHoberman/15-qualities-you-should-look-for-in-a-business-coach.  The highlights are below:

  • FRIENDSHIP Builds a Mutual Relationship based on mutual respect. Look for someone who uses respectful dialogue. This could turn into a life-long friendship. Even though this begins as a business relationship, in order to be truly effective, it generally goes beyond that phase because the coach learns as much from the client as the client learns from the coach.
  • TRUST Not everyone in today’s society has a trusted advisor they can count on. Many people have ulterior motives when they are asked to help someone else. A great coach is someone you can trust and has true interest in your success and reaching your self-declared goals.
  • LISTEN A great coach really understands good listening is often taken for granted. The very best conversations and relationships involve our intentional listening- listening to learn, with a clear and quiet mind, not just waiting for our turn to speak. Listening is a great coach’s gift to their client!
  • INSPIRE A great coach helps create a vision and helps describe it. They will understand your passion and continues to inspire you by reminding you of your original passion and purpose.
  • EXPERIENCE A great coach should have years of experience and speaks your language. Their experience should not only bring an understanding in business, but more importantly, experience with people.
  • GOALS Many times goals are set too low requiring minimal effort to reach them, or too high where it becomes unrealistic to reach them. A great coach helps you set realistic goals that are achievable but requires effort to reach them.
  • MOTIVATION What drives you? What are you looking to achieve? It’s easy to be derailed when your goals aren’t reached quickly enough. A great coach defines your goals and breaks them down into small steps so that you can see successes along the way.
  • ORGANIZED A great coach provides organization & simplification. They help order thoughts and gives a formula for success and help develop a process to achieve whatever you want to accomplish. A great coach customizes the process to align with your needs.
  • CHALLENGE A great coach identifies challenges. Including ones that you may not even see which can prepare you for a smoother outcome. Remember, you don’t know what you don’t know!
  • PATH A great coach develops solutions. They help develop a path out of the challenges at hand. A road map that runs interference and provides a clear path to achieve your vision.
  • EXPECTATIONS A great coach is someone who helps guide expectations. They help you to understand your own expectations which tend to be influenced many times with over optimism. Reasonable expectations with early successes, victories and important milestones reached will take away the discouragement many find while navigating a difficult path.
  • GROWTH A great coach ensures your growth by challenging you. They move you out of your comfort zone with necessary steps and actions to achieve your goals and create scenarios and opportunities for you to be well rounded.
  • MEASURE A great coach evaluates your performance. They develop a process that measures your performance. Constantly evaluating your performance with real time feedback gives you the opportunity to learn and trains you to solve your own challenges with a set of effective tools.
  • ACCOUNTABLE A great coach is an accountability partner. For your self-declared goals, a coach will provide constructive feedback so that you can achieve what you set out to do. You are less likely to hold yourself fully accountable if you don’t share your goals with someone that is a trusted and objective partner.
  • SUPPORT A great coach is supportive. They are always there for support even when there may not be anyone else that can see, believes in, or supports your vision.

Remember, Coaching is the universal language of change and learning.

15 Qualities You Should Look For In A Business Coach

Do you have a great business coach? Are you looking for one? Here are 15 of the most important qualities to look for when seeking out and eventually building a relationship with a business coach.

Happy Coaching!

So Many Decisions (and 3 tips to ensure you have your act together!)

One of the activities I love the most is to be a mentor for young women.  I believe this goes back to being the only female in many industries and having no female role model to follow. I knew I was missing something.  Over the past few years I have had the pleasure and honor of mentoring some amazing young women.  Of course my first and most special is my daughter, and I hope I have lived up to her expectations.

The other afternoon I met with my mentee Shirley, and as we were going through her choices going forward I was thrust into the old cliche-“Do what I say, not as I do”  because I found myself giving her some solid advice….that I should be following myself.  She is going to graduate and the world is right in front of her.  She is an intelligent young woman with the most amazing work ethics and integrity and is proud of who she is.  She is passionate about some things and tolerant of others but how do you make one decision when there are so many options in front of you.

The first question I asked her, that my business coach asked me some years ago, “If you could do anything you wanted and money, time and age would not be a factor and you could NOT fail, what would it be?  Most people have trouble with this but she had some definite answers.  As she was speaking I knew a phone call I needed to make to someone that she should be connected to…and we did that at that moment.  She was now starting her road map to get to her goals.  We continued peeling back the onion and with each piece we came up some ideas and strategies with agreed upon completion dates.  We then wrote the items down on her calendar and the goal setting began.

Now, how does this relate to me. Aren’t I  the one who is supposed to be the savvy entrepreneur who has her act together….well I thought I did to some extent before our meeting.  So here is what I learned and I thank my beautiful mentee for pinning me down to my own devices:

  1. Write down your goals- Understand that they might need some adjusting and rearranging.
  2. Have someone to bounce things off of.  Your ideas might sound reasonable until you say them out loud.  An objective person can add valuable insight.
  3. Never give up on your dreams. Sometimes they may seem out of reach but with some discussion and other resources they become crystal clear.

Remember- Every day is the beginning of a new dream.  Focus on what is important to you and make your dreams come true.

Happy Selling!