Training – Change is Inevitable, Growth is Optional

How To Get More Qualified Sales…It’s All About The Process

Let’s talk about the sales process. No matter the product, the industry, the length of time…the process is generally the process. Where it begins and ends might be a little different for someone but again…the process is generally the process.

I know many believe you are not in sales or don’t want to be considered a salesperson. Guess what though…EVERYONE is in sales! We sell the most important commodity every single day…OURSELVES.

Most people work better with a process. When you have a process in place, you have the exact steps to follow so that you can not only achieve your goals but will crash through them. The easier the process, the better the results.

When you think of a process, most people generally think about numbers and steps and formulas…what if there was something that was a process that had nothing to do with any of those and more to do with how you treat your client?

Did you know that being interested in your clients, rather than being interested in them should always be part of that process? Investing in your relationships is one easy way to show the importance of being interested not interesting.

When I was on the road in the height of my sales career, I had a mason contractor that became the COI that changed my entire career. He asked me to show up on a jobsite, I did. He asked me to speak to his key people, I did. He asked me if I would speak to all of his men and get them protected, I did and then I made sure he was kept in the loop and checked in on him on a regular basis… My business was 100% referrals from that moment on. I was interested in him not interesting to him. How is that for an important part of the process?

Are you ready to get even more strategies? Head on over to www.skirtstrategy .com/joinus

Happy Selling!

Judy Hoberman www.sellinginaskirt.com

Feeding Your Mind

A few months ago, I was in the airport and, as I always do, I people watch. Sometimes I simply watch and sometimes I engage in conversation. This particular day, our flight was delayed, and I was talking with a woman about where we were both going and was it business or pleasure. She was going to visit family and I was heading out to speak at a conference. In our conversation we talked about learning and growing in our positions and how as a coach I have at least one coach at all times. She looked at me as if I said something so bizarre, she didn’t understand it. She told me that she didn’t believe in coaching. Her boss did and had a coach, but not her. When I asked why, she told me that if you have a coach, you are expected to do more, learn more and know more and she was just fine where she was. I think I was the one with the look of disbelief because I truly believe that you must feed your mind with the right nutrition.

Every day we feed our bodies. We don’t always give it the right nutrition, but do we ever really consider that when we feed our bodies, we are also feeding our minds? Let’s start with our buddy the TV. Some use it as their source for world happenings, some use it for mindless ways to relax and some use it as baby-sitters, so they can get things done. The problem is that many people see what they watch as reality and compare themselves to who they are watching. Some disappear into another dimension. Many feel the news is negative and that is like eating fast food, lots of quantity but not as much quality in nutrition. Is your mind getting the proper nutrition from any of that?

Today many people listen to podcasts. There are many ways to learn and grow from those that share information that is current and relevant. Yes, you can still choose the mindless and the unrealistic, but more and more people are turning their TVs off and turning on podcasts. You have your choice of gender, generation, entrepreneurial, personal development and growing and learning. Is your mind getting the proper nutrition from that?

Knowledge is something you can never lose. When you invest in yourself you are investing into your future. You are never too old to learn. If you stop learning your brain starts dying. And if your brain is not kept alive and stimulated, life can become very boring and dull, and that is definitely not the proper nutrition you should feed your mind with.

Research has shown that the capacity of the average person’s brain vastly outweighs what they use it for. And yet, it never occurs to us to invest in a little training every now and then!

For 400 years, scientists believed that we were stuck with the brain we were born with. Luckily for us, that theory has gone out the window. Neuroplasticity is an amazing new theory that has proven one very incredible fact: Our brains can change.

This means that if you’re not highly intelligent in one area – that’s okay! You have the option to literally change that area of your brain through a little training.

An easy way to think about it is: Your brain is a muscle – you need to exercise it regularly! You need to invest a little time every now and then.

So, what can you do?

1. Be Curious-Instead of taking everything at face value, get into the habit of questioning everything. While most disclaimers would be placed right here that it is or isn’t safe to do this at home, be careful how many questions you ask. I am often met with “Another question?” If you don’t ask, you don’t know. Think of how you would or could improve upon everyday things. By being curious and questioning everything, you force your brain to innovate and create new ideas.

2. Exercise Regularly-It’s been proven that exercise helps to increase brain function. This means that every time you exercise you are creating new brain cells! Get off the couch and get moving! Your brain will thank you for it.

3. Do Something New– When you experience something “new,” you stimulate your brain. Don’t get stuck in a rut doing the same old things; the only way to change the structure of your brain is to try new things. What have you been wanting to try? …now is the time to do it and feed your brain.

4. Train Your Memory-Discipline yourself to memorize phone numbers and other important numbers. Do you ever listen to someone rattle off their license or credit card number and wonder how they remembered that? I still know my phone number from 1960. Your memory is also a muscle that needs training, and modern technology has made us lazy! Try doing the old math without a calculator as well. You’re in for a treat.

5. Think Positive-Stress and anxiety kills existing brain neurons and also stops new neurons from being created. Research has shown that positive thinking, especially in the future tense, speeds up the creation of cells and dramatically reduces stress and anxiety. Turn around some of your thoughts and turn the negative ones into positive ones. Your brain isn’t the only place you will see the results.

6. Eat Healthy-Our diets have a HUGE impact on brain function. Our brains consume over 20 percent of all nutrients and oxygen that we consume. So, remember to feed your brain with the good stuff! While we all like foods that are not the best for us, don’t forget the fresh fruits and vegetables with a little chocolate or wine on the side.

7. Read A Book-Reading relieves tension and stress because it’s a form of escapism. Research has also shown that using your imagination is a great way to train your brain, because you force your mind to picture what you are imagining. Reading is a great way to trigger your imagination and fuel your creative genius. What are you reading right now?

8 Get Enough Sleep-Sleep is like a mini detox for the brain. This is when your body regenerates cells and removes all the toxins that have built up during the day. Get to bed between the hours of 9 pm and midnight to benefit from the most effective hours of sleep. I’m so excited to report that I am asleep by 9:12 so I’m right there with feeding my brain every night.

Remember, you are the books you read, the movies you watch, the music you listen to, the people you spend time with, the conversations you engage in. Choose wisely what you feed your mind.

Happy Selling!

Judy www.sellinginaskirt.com

Stop Being The Best-Kept Secret

It’s so funny when you think about how you show up in your business. We talk about being authentic and generous and courageous and passionate. But what does that look like? How do people get to participate in what you have to share? More importantly are you showing up at all or are you hoping that people will find you simply because you’re fabulous? Are you ready to stop being the best-kept secret in business?

Whether you are showing off what you have, dreaming of being a house-hold name or day-dreaming the “what-if or when I have” game, being the best-kept secret in business is not the best business strategy to have. Sometimes you are waiting for the knight in shining armor aka the person that gives you a contract to do business with them or you are simply playing small and not bringing out your full potential persona. Either way…you’re playing a game of doom and gloom. The truth is more people are afraid of success than they are of failure, so they play small or not at all.

The reality is that it’s all about becoming known in the markets you serve and building a reputation that helps to start the buying and selling process with prospective clients. If you do it right you will not only build awareness, it will also help you to reach out to people you don’t know and who don’t know you.

The bottom line is this: If someone doesn’t know you exist, how can they ever do business with you? Here are some important guidelines that will help you in your quest to go from unknown to known:

1. Be persistent. Studies have shown it takes anywhere from 8-15 touches for your marketing message to sink in. So be patient… and stay with it!

2. Be consistent. Consider the look, feel and tone of your messaging, particularly when you use multiple channels. Make sure the viewer knows that all those messages came from the same business.

3. Show not just who you are but what you are. Make sure your messages also include why someone would want to do business with you and what sets you apart. In other words, what makes you unique?

Take an integrated approach. Your marketing tactics should all work together. Put your social media icons in your e-mail. Put your website URL on your ads. Make sure your LinkedIn profile address is on your business cards. And so on.

Awareness-building is 2-step process. Step 1 is getting to the top-of-mind position in the psyche of your prospective buyers. Step 2 is staying there over time. So, make sure your awareness-building plan covers both.

Marketing yourself is not always the easiest thing to do but it is a necessity. Let’s flash forward just a little bit to the point where you are starting to build a following and your product or service is showing positive results. Where can you find those walking ambassadors who will shout your name out every chance they get? Here are a few ideas:

1. Build trust- Word of mouth recognition for a job well done, a product or service, is built on the reputation of trust, which takes time, effort and even a few failures along the way. When someone asks how you build your business, let them know its word of mouth. It’s also important to let them know that when something doesn’t go as smoothly as you would like, acknowledge it and learn from it and let them know you appreciate their feedback.

2. Do a great job- Deliver service that’s so exceptionally good it gets everyone talking. Avoid spreading yourself too thin by trying to be all things to all people. Instead, focus on what you do best and exceed expectations. A strong, personal referral from someone that knows your value and conveys trust in your ability is far better than anything else.

3. Ask for testimonials- If a client gives you great feedback, ask them if you can use their endorsement to let others know about their experience. A one or two sentence statement in their words, can be helpful on your website, brochure, social media channels or other marketing pieces. If you can get that in a video, even better. I have mine in a folder and when I have those days that aren’t going the way I planned, I take them out and watch, listen and read…great reminder of why I do what I do.

4. Give back- Get your business involved with the community. Create visibility for your company that lets others know you are working to make your community a better place. That can be an important way to distinguish yourself from competitors.

5. Build relationships- Don’t forget a customer once the job is over. Continue the relationship with them so the next time they need what you offer, they will think of you. The heavy lifting comes after the contract is signed, the money is paid, and the job is underway. This is the time that service is at an all-time high. This is also where relationships are solidified.

6. And finally…Say thank you- When you get a new customer, ask how they heard of you. If it’s a referral from an existing client, be sure to thank that person for recommending you. Send a note via regular mail. Let them know how important their referrals are to your business, and that you are happy they have had a good experience with your company. So many people forget this important piece. Those that remember, stand out and start to become a little less of that best-kept secret.

Your name is your brand—and you’re anything but generic.

Remember, start by doing what’s necessary, then what’s possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.

Happy Selling!

Judy Hoberman www.sellinginaskirt.com

The Barriers We Create In Our Minds

Think about this… I was planning on putting on a telesummit with 25 other women. I had hand-selected them, had the email invitation to them and was excited to be organizing and facilitating it….until that word creeped into my brain….I’m not big enough or famous enough or smart enough…I even threw in tall enough and told my husband I was cancelling it before I even got started. He asked me why and I gave him my spiel of the “enough” nonsense. He looked at me and said, very calmly and lovingly… “Are you nuts?” He continued with “People want to be around you. They trust you and admire you. They respect who you are and how you are in it for them. Don’t let them down.” What do you say to that? I said I would give it until 6:00 and if I have any second thoughts, I’m cancelling it. So, at 1 minute to 6, I hit send on 25 emails and turned my computer off…. totally. I couldn’t bear people telling me no and called it a night. 12 hours later, at 6am, I turned my computer on and 24 of the 25 said yes, absolutely, thank you for asking me, honored…. on and on and on. I looked for the 25th and an hour later it also came in with a big yes…she was in Australia and the time difference was the only reason it was late. I share this story often because no matter who you are, what you represent or why you do what you do….“enough” will creep in and you have to do everything to chase it away…it’s all about those barriers that we have in our minds…are they real or not?

The telesummit was a huge success. The women, the information, the value was such a winning combination. I had created a barrier that could have cancelled everything great and left me with the “oh woe is me syndrome.” You see I had created barriers that were bigger than my goals and already had the scenario playing out of what would happen if I had decided to go through with this crazy plan. I decided that the only way I was going to use that word enough was to convince myself that enough was clearly enough. All the results I knew in my mind that were going to happen, didn’t and that is usually what happens. We are so sure that whatever we want to do won’t happen in a positive way that we can visualize failure and smell it before it even has a moment to be created. Why do we do that?

There are several things that cause us to lose our confidence and feel like the barriers are closing in. Here are just a few:

Age-Many times we let our age define us. Whether we are too young or too old. Sometimes we tell ourselves that and sometimes others tell us what we should and shouldn’t do. If you want to break down some of those barriers, don’t listen to them.
What Other People Think-No matter what we tell ourselves, we still compare ourselves to others. That is really a waste of time and energy. Why compare yourself to those on social media since they are showing only what they want you to see? Where is that being authentic? Feel good about what you are doing, what you have already done and what you are planning to do. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.

Toxic People-Who are you surrounding yourself with? Are they people that you trust and admire? Will they support you to reach your goals? Or…are they energy vampires? I make it a point to release all toxic people from my life. I don’t lose them because they can be found. I release them so they don’t return.
Fear-As I mentioned, we have great imaginations and we tend to create an entire volume of stories that can happen to us…Fortunately they don’t. Fear is a choice. I encourage my clients to step into the unknown and I always ask, “What’s the worst that can happen?” and follow that up with, “What’s the best that can happen?”
Are you living in the past or hoping for the future? We all know that the past is the past and it can’t be changed. However, when you concentrate on the future, you do have the ability to make it something that you are excited to reach…but it’s still not here right now. Being in the present and living in the present let’s others know that you are ready for the opportunities that are in front of you and that you are taking the present for what it is…a gift.

Do you see yourself creating barriers from any of the reasons I mentioned? Time to talk it out with a coach or mentor or someone you trust and flip your mindset to the positive side, so those barriers are taken down, not built up. The truth is most people are not willing to disregard some of the feelings they have and do what needs to be done to eliminate the barriers. It’s time to understand that when you break through the barriers once, you will realize it was never as bad as you thought it would be. When your “Why” is strong enough, you will be willing to do the “How” …

Think of it this way…Start Small-We have to practice to get it right. If you’re in sports or play an instrument or anything that you want to become the expert in, you have to practice. You start small and work your way up. The more often you face that barrier and confront it, the more successful you will be and the next time it shows up, you’ll be able to walk right through it.

Then…Trust Yourself-What will it take for you to stop worrying about what others think or what their opinion of you is? When you start to trust yourself, your potential is unlimited. No matter how successful we are, we still second guess ourselves. When I was at a conference, a Queen was in the audience and she told me that every time she has to make a decision that will affect someone’s life, she second guesses herself, so consider yourself in great company. Take time to learn the lessons that life throws your way. These lessons will be critical to your success as you make progress along your journey toward your goals.

Arthur C. Clarke said, “The limits of the possible can only be defined by going beyond them into the impossible.”

Happy Selling!

Judy Hoberman http://www.sellinginaskirt.com

The Power To Change

In 2009, I knew I wasn’t in the right place. I tried to make myself fit in. Since I’ve always felt like a square peg in a round hole for most of my life, this wasn’t a new sensation. But something was different. I was looking for a sign or an opportunity or someone to tell me it was time to move along, but no message was coming through. An email ended up in my inbox. It’s the kind of email that you delete because it is so long and it’s from someone you don’t know and why waste your time wasting your time? For some reason, I did read it and it was about an event that was going to take place in a few weeks in MD. I called my sister-in-law and told her about it, and we decided to meet in MD and if the conference wasn’t anything we wanted to hear, we would spend the weekend together and catch up. She lived in NJ and I lived in TX.

We met there and something happened. The woman on stage was speaking directly to me. She was saying things I had only said to myself. She was the voice, the message and the opportunity to do something…and I did. The next Monday I went back to my office, I handed in my resignation and I finally took control of my life…I had the power to change.

Change is inevitable. Sometimes change is forced upon us, while other times we initiate it. How skilled are you at handling the need to shift course, whether it is brought on by external or internal forces? How do you tend to feel when you step outside your comfort zone? Exhilarated? Terrified? Lost? Remember, comfort zones are relative. Every time you step into uncharted territory, sooner or later you will find some degree of comfort there. Do not settle too deeply into this new comfort zone, as it may soon be time to step out again.

When you are in a leadership position, others look to you for cues as to how they, too, might manage shifting tides and forge bravely ahead. Here are some of the benefits of change:

Personal growth-Every time something changes, you have the opportunity to grow and learn not only about “things” but also about yourself.

Flexibility-Change forces us to be flexible. You must bend and shift to meet new circumstances.

Situations improve-It may not look that way at first, but it is up to you to optimize the situation. You probably did not choose to be worse off than before—at least not for the long haul. So, whether the change was made by you, to you, or for you, get your big girl panties on and make improvements in your life.

Your core values are tested and strengthened-No matter what comes your way, your core values are what define you, so look at change as a way to reinforce those values.

You will become stronger-We all know the adage, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” I have found this to be true in my life. I also have learned that being stronger sometimes means asking for help.

Opportunities will appear-They may be what you had hoped for, or they may be things you never previously considered. Be open and remain curious about what opportunities this change will bring.

While change can be difficult, not changing can be fatal. We probably all can name now-defunct businesses that did not adapt to the times or to changes in consumer preferences. This applies as much to people as it does to companies. I remember my father was a jeweler. He crafted very expensive pieces and during the recession in the 80’s, we all suggested that he bring in some less expensive pieces. They could still be unique, but they weren’t going to cost a small fortune. He was adamant that he didn’t need to change, and you know the saying, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. I mentioned that perhaps we could bring in some local designers, some new ones that were starting out and had great promise. Again, he declined, and we stopped trying to show him how change could be powerful. In the end, his store closed, and he blamed everything except the power that he had to change. BTW, the designer that I had spoken to that was just starting out…David Yurman.

We are all going through a time where it seems everything is changing. The way you do business. The way you connect. The way you say hello. The way you take care of yourself. While you feel like nothing is the same, you are probably being pushed outside your comfort zone. It’s time for you to understand and then…accept change and be brilliant.

Start with baby steps. While some of our changes were thrown to us without any warning, remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day. Start with one step, then add another. Do not try to change everything at once. You will become overwhelmed, and when that happens, nothing else happens. Prioritize what needs to get done and start there. When you complete one baby step, go for another one. Do not forget to take a moment and congratulate yourself on a job well done. Throw in a reward or two and watch how quickly you move through your list.

Get support. Do not do it alone. Surround yourself with positive people who can provide experience, wisdom, and connections. They too are navigating these choppy waters. While you are asking for help, they are also receiving some from you.

Going back to the phrase “Change is Inevitable…let’s add on Growth is Optional.” Your reaction, attitude and behavior to change is in your hands. Remember…you have the power to change.

An old English proverb sums it all up, “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.”

To add levity while applying these needed course corrections, I like to declare, “Plot twist!” A little humor goes a long way.

Happy Selling!

Judy Hoberman http://www.sellinginaskirt.com

Are You Hearing What I’m Saying?

Think about this…as a speaker, you have an event coming up. You talk to the organizer or meeting planner about who the audience is, what their expectations are and what the message they want you to share and are prepared to accomplish that. You review your talking points and are excited to really offer the attendees exactly what you were told they needed. You’re a bit nervous as you always are before a talk and then…you walk in and the audience is not who the planner told you they would be, the message you have is not relevant to them and you know that there is no way you will relate to them or them to you. All you wanted was to connect with them and talk about what was important to them…any hope of them hearing your message is now out the window. You only hope you wake up from this nightmare of a dream.

That scenario, as crazy as it sounds, really did happen to me. I always do my homework and know the audience, what the meeting planner wants and needs and provide some tips for immediate implementation so it isn’t simply a rah rah talk and will be forgotten as soon as everyone goes back into their own “real” world. I should have realized when the planner didn’t have a lot of information and everything I asked had a “sounds great” response. Any certain verbiage or examples I should use? “You’ve got this and sounds great” was all I received. Even after doing research on the group, I didn’t find a lot to work with, but I knew the message she wanted…and so I was ready to connect and bring value.

And then…I walked into the room that was to be 98% female and it was anything but that. The attendees were looking for something totally different than what I was prepared to share with them and although I did some amazing tap dancing, the majority of the room and I were not connecting and I left ready to throw in the towel. I have never felt so horrible. I received a comment that I should never be invited back as I wasn’t prepared…and that was one of the good ones. I reached out to the planner and apologized for not giving the attendees what they were looking for and she told me she thought it was great and she loves having me and can’t wait to do this again. I wasn’t even sure if she was in the same room as I didn’t feel that at all.

So, the question is, how important is communicating effectively? How about connecting to the people on your team? Are they hearing the message that you are intending to send? Unfortunately, for most of us, our communication goals are not consistently achieved; our message is not received as it was intended. Communication is a necessary skill for all interpersonal relations; personal or professional. If a message is not understood, you have not communicated.

Your role as a leader is to:

To make communication as simple as possible
To be clear
To create understanding and meaning
To generate feedback
To check for understanding

Here are some ways to connect effectively:

Be genuine. The only connections that work will be the ones that you truly care about; the world will see through anything short of that. If you don’t have a genuine interest in the person with whom you’re trying to connect with, then stop trying. As a leader, you must show that you are there to support someone’s goals and dreams. We don’t have to agree with their journey…you need to support it. It’s about them, not about you.
Provide massive help. Most people never reach out to anyone above their level. Did you know that everyone needs help or support in something? You have more to offer than you realize and those on your team want to learn from you. For women especially, it’s hard enough to ask for help. When someone does, pay attention to them and be interested in them.
Persistence is key. When you are looking to connect with someone, you can’t give up after one attempt. It’s the same with someone trying to get your attention. We are all busy and may not be able to jump when someone needs us. Sometimes a simple email or message letting them know when you are available will ease the situation. Communication is at an all-time high when they are trying to connect with you. Put yourself in their shoes…how would you want to be heard?
Make real connections. Think about how you’ve made the connections you have. That’s all this is. You only create relationships with people you genuinely want in your life. The same rule should apply with those reaching out to you. Don’t over-think it. Be human, be helpful and most humans will happily be human in return, regardless of who they are or what position they hold.
Remain unforgettable, in other words, find ways to stand out. Remember birthdays or important events happening in your team. Give them your favorite book signed. Be genuinely helpful. You’d be surprised how the simplest things actually never get done. Being memorable isn’t as hard as some think! Be the leader or mentor that you wish you had. Imagine what that would feel like for someone else.

Here is something to ponder… Think about a situation in which you experienced difficulty in communicating effectively with another person. If you had the opportunity for a second chance, what would you do differently? Was it the message or was it the way it was communicated? As a leader you need to understand what the other person is saying-not necessarily agreeing with it. Check in to make sure you both understand what is said and what is heard…and especially what isn’t said.

As Steven Stowell said, “Great leaders find ways to connect with their people and help them fulfill their potential.”

Happy Selling!

Judy Hoberman http://www.sellinginaskirt.com

Step Up Men – Don’t Hide Behind the #MeToo “movement”. We Must Champion Women!

Have you heard this, or something like this — “I am not going to take a chance and support or mentor women in the workplace, because you never know, she could come back years later and accuse me of sexual harassment and there goes my career!”

Are you kidding me? This is one of the most backwards statements I have ever heard of!

What Is #MeToo and Does that Impact Me as Male Leader?

So what is#MeToo? I boil it down to an upward swell of women AND men who are done with being sexually harassed and abused …especially in the workplace. (Yes, men too. It has been noted that 1 in 6 men have experienced sexual abuse) #MeToo has brought this abusive behavior to the front of people’s minds and is putting the world on notice that this is not acceptable, in any situation, in any form.

So will this impact you? Yes, the world is a-changin! If you are a man that likes to leverage power and sex to control people, you are now on notice – this will absolutely impact your ability to successfully manage. (Notice I did not say “lead,” because a true LEADER would not use control or limit actions by means of abusive power.)

Be Professional…be respectful!

“But, I am Concerned that I Will Be Unfairly or Wrongly Accused”

I hear this talk from men in many circles. Did you know that there have been studies in the US, UK, and in Europe that of the accusations, only about 2% to 6%, are deemed false? Additionally, there are asterisks and caveats that point out some reports may have been mis-categorized as false when there may not be enough legal evidence to prosecute.

The best approach, be professional, don’t put yourself in a situation that could be misconstrued. Keep your physical contact to a handshake. (I know for those of us living and working in cultures that accept hugs or kisses as appropriate, this advice may be difficult) When having a 1:1 conversation, don’t lock the door or if you are able, keep the door open.

My mother has always told me – “when you wonder about the right way to act, just ask ‘would I approve of what you are saying or doing?'” I constantly ask myself – “is this ok if I were in front of my wife or daughter?”

Be Professional…be respectful!

Women Need Men as Supporters and Sponsors in the Work Place

Let’s face the facts – it is true there are more men than women in leadership positions. This is why it is an imperative that Men MUST be the Champions in leveling the playing field. We need to instill and foster a culture where women feel comfortable having men as mentors and coaches.

Did you know that it is a proven fact that companies led by women are more profitable and tend to grow faster with more sustainability. Hey, as a stock holder or investor – that’s what I want….MORE PROFIT and higher sustainability!!

Over the past 50 years, we have made great strides to reduce the inequity; in society and in the workplace. If we are not careful, this type of ignorant thinking will set all of this advancement back in time. We all need to work together to keep the momentum.

Why Do I Care About Championing Women?

You may ask what is my motivation? It’s pure and simple, I have two daughters, six nieces, and two granddaughters. I am fortunate to be married to one of the most intelligent, professional women I have ever met.

I want to help build a culture that treats them with Professionally and with Respect,afforded the same opportunities that that are afforded me, my son, nephew, and grandson.

Bottomline men – don’t use the #MeToo movement an easy excuse to not do the hard things. Think about your wife, your daughter or granddaughter and I guarantee you too will want to Champion Women! Do not be afraid to be a mentor, coach, or sponsor to a talented up-and-coming leader.

Step Up Men!

#womeninleadership #menwhochampionwomen #walkingontheglassfloor

Jim Steinmark

Coach, Mentor or Sponsor – Which Do You Need?

You probably hear about people having an executive coach or a mentor. A term you may not be as familiar with is a sponsor. Are these different terms for the same thing or do they really serve different purposes? The answer is they are definitely different, and are all important for your career growth. Let me break it down for you.

Coach – This is a formal arrangement initiated by an individual or organization. The goal is to help you improve certain skills or handle specific areas of development. Working with a coach usually follows some type of a structured process that may involve using assessments to gauge skill level and/or collecting feedback from those you work for, with, or who report to you. The coaching relationship usually has a finite duration. At some point your goals will be achieved and the coaching contract will end.

Mentor – A mentor/mentee relationship is usually, but not always informal. Many large organizations have formal mentoring programs. When informal, the relationship may start by identifying someone you admire or want advice from, such as learning how to navigate your organization or grow your career. While a coach helps you with specific skills, a mentor may be a sounding board when confronted with situations you’re encountering for the first time, help you identify and build on your strengths, or talk with about career options. Some mentoring relationships last a lifetime while others eventually run their course. The agenda for informal mentoring is set by the individual rather than the mentor or organization.

Sponsor – A sponsor is someone at a senior level in your organization who advocates for you when you are being considered for a promotion or special project. You don’t choose a sponsor, they choose you; usually by being in a position to see your work and recognize your talent and potential. If you have a mentor who also has an executive position in your company, they may, over time turn into a sponsor.

So which do you need to maximize your carer development? All of them. At some point in your career, each of these roles can help you improve your performance, get promoted or grow your career. So take the initiative and ask for or find a coach, engage a mentor, and grow relationships with senior leaders to cultivate a sponsor.

Alexis Gladstone

How High Are Your Standards?

I always have interesting conversations and incredible people watching episodes when I’m at the airport. I listen and observe, I engage and I observe some more. At one airport, I was waiting for a flight and we were delayed so many times that it was almost a game to see when the app and the actual board in front of us would match as to the newest departure time. There was a woman standing next to me. She was well-dressed and was friendly enough. We were sharing some travel stories and then we got to “what do you do?” I told her I was an Executive Coach, a speaker, trainer, radio show host and author. She asked who I worked with and I gave her that information. I of course turned the conversation to her and asked what she did. She worked for a large organization and had been there for many years… “After all, why should I leave? I get paid, don’t have to do too much and I get to do some traveling.” The conversation went on for a bit and she mentioned that she had never had a coach but her boss swears by them. Of course I needed to probe a little more and she told me, without any hesitation, she had never and would NEVER hire a coach because she would be expected to work more and harder and that is not what she wants to do. It started me thinking about standards and how as entrepreneurs we need to set the bar higher than we can even imagine. People will choose to work with you if what you are offering them is the best quality or service to solve their problem.

The truth is most people don’t like high standards because they create a lot of work – especially the kind of work that nobody likes in the first place. In the real world, getting from good to great requires extraordinary efforts and high standards. It demands more time than you want, more energy than you have, and more cooperation than any normal person can be expected to contribute.

That’s IF you want high standards. If you are willing to settle for “good,” things can be much easier – and you can be much nicer. How about if we talk about standards…for instance what are they anyway?

Your standards define how you act, which, in turn, builds trust in your brand. They can be guidelines that describe your quality, your performance, your style or your systems. Standards must align with your mission, business objectives, and leadership, and be implemented consistently.

What about our own personal standards? Are they written on a wall for all to see? Not necessarily, but think about this; personal standards are what separates the highest achievers from everyone else. Personal standards are nothing more than a set of behaviors. These behaviors are built upon expectations you have of yourself in a variety of situations. Your personal standards are reflected in how you treat yourself, and also in how you treat other people. They are also reflected in how you expect to be treated by other people. When you have high standards you expect to be treated with the highest of regard. However, when your standards are low it suggests that you are lacking in the self-esteem department. Remember though, no matter who your customer is, you shouldn’t change your standards to meet theirs.

Your personal standards are also reflected in the promises you keep, the way you show up, and are reflected in the quality of your work, values and communication. In fact, everything you do and say gives others an indication of the personal standards you live by. As women, we might have to work a little harder and set the bar a little higher to be treated on an equal playing field, and that’s ok. It’s just a little extra stretch…and we’re used to that.

Luckily, if you turn to entrepreneurship as a way to fulfil your potentials and meet your standards as well, there are so many valuable resources to learn from. No longer do we need to learn everything through trial and error! And that feeling that you’re not alone in your striving, that helps. Just recently I’ve interviewed Stefan Pretty, an interesting Scottish entrepreneur who created Subbly, a management software for subscription businesses. But what really inspired me is the way he shows a step-by-step approach (that’s what I love about it…plus it’s easy to follow) on how to start a subscription box, making that start line (which is often the most difficult one) as straightforward as possible. And once you actually start something, it becomes easier to continue evolving and also, raise the standards when you realize that goals were more achievable then you thought!

Speaking of which…Do you have goals that you would like to achieve? Have you ever considered that in order to achieve these goals that you must first raise your personal standards in certain aspects of your life? Setting low standards will only take you so far along your journey towards your goal. With low standards you will simply not put enough work, time, energy or resources into this goal. You will not be able to give this goal what it requires, and therefore you will end up not getting the results you truly want.

When you set high standards you immediately raise your expectations of what’s possible. You suddenly expect more from yourself, more from your actions, and more from others. And with a higher set of expectations you are willing to do more to get the results you’re after, and your performance level shoots straight up.

As Tony Robbins said, “Any time you sincerely want to make a change, the first thing you must do is to raise your standards.”

Don’t be like my airport buddy thinking that having a coach means others will expect more from you and that is a negative thing…after all, what is wrong with that?

The Value Of Coaching

When I started my company in 2009, one of the first things I did was to understand what I didn’t know how to do. I loved people, I could sell, I wanted to make a difference and always wanted to bring value. All sounds great so far right? What I didn’t really know how to do was to create a company or a business that would support me in loving people, selling, making a difference and bringing value.

So the first step was knowing what I needed and then realizing I didn’t know what I didn’t know and that is where my business coach came in. She sat me down and asked me a lot of questions, listened to my goals or dreams and together we worked together to put that in place. Again, sounds great so far right? Here’s the REAL truth. You have to know how to listen to your coach. They have the experience and expertise. If you had an athletic coach who told you to hit the ball or kick the ball or catch the ball or whatever with the ball and you thought you knew better, where do you think that would end up? Ok not much different with a business coach.

Everything she told me to do made perfect sense, however, I already knew that, already tried that and was already to dismiss that. Let me just say that if you asked me what type of person I don’t ever want to coach…it would be the ones that say I’ve done that already, I’ve tried that already and the rest of that nonsense. During one of my sessions, it was decided that I would write a book. It wasn’t necessarily my decision as it was never on my radar, but my coach suggested that since I had 30 years of “stuff” in my head, why not organize it and share it with others. I finally agreed and she told me to have an outline, not the book itself, just an outline completed by a certain date. I sheepishly agreed and didn’t really give it another thought. Remember, I knew better…The date came and we were having a session and towards the end she asked me to show her the outline. It was not completed or really, it was not even started. She was less than happy but very professional. She didn’t say what she probably wanted to say but she did say this… “Let’s get in the car and drive for a few minutes. Then let’s open the windows and throw all your money out, roll up the windows and leave.” I thought she had lost her mind and then she finished with “Why are you paying me all this money when you don’t do any of the work? How will your business ever get off the ground? How will people know who you are? How will you ever make a difference or bring value?” That was the day I realized how important a coach really is.

The truth is that coaching helps people focus on the things that are contributing to their being stuck, and then move beyond them. I knew I was stuck in a place that I didn’t recognize and I needed someone who knew better than I did and who was totally objective to move me along. Harvey Mackay said, “Athletes and actors have long hired coaches to help prepare for a specific competition or role. But they aren’t the only ones who can benefit from expert advice. Coaches are available to help people in any field improve their “game.” You see will all need to improve our game…no matter what field that is in.

There are so many reasons to have a coach for your business. Ever think about what qualities you should look for? I put together a Slide Share about this topic. Here are the highlights and you can go to slideshare.net- 15 Qualities You Should Look For In A Business Coach. You can check it out at https://www.slideshare.net/JHoberman/15-qualities-you-should-look-for-in-a-business-coach. The highlights are below:

FRIENDSHIP Builds a Mutual Relationship based on mutual respect. Look for someone who uses respectful dialogue. This could turn into a life-long friendship. Even though this begins as a business relationship, in order to be truly effective, it generally goes beyond that phase because the coach learns as much from the client as the client learns from the coach.
TRUST Not everyone in today’s society has a trusted advisor they can count on. Many people have ulterior motives when they are asked to help someone else. A great coach is someone you can trust and has true interest in your success and reaching your self-declared goals.
LISTEN A great coach really understands good listening is often taken for granted. The very best conversations and relationships involve our intentional listening- listening to learn, with a clear and quiet mind, not just waiting for our turn to speak. Listening is a great coach’s gift to their client!
INSPIRE A great coach helps create a vision and helps describe it. They will understand your passion and continues to inspire you by reminding you of your original passion and purpose.
EXPERIENCE A great coach should have years of experience and speaks your language. Their experience should not only bring an understanding in business, but more importantly, experience with people.
GOALS Many times goals are set too low requiring minimal effort to reach them, or too high where it becomes unrealistic to reach them. A great coach helps you set realistic goals that are achievable but requires effort to reach them.
MOTIVATION What drives you? What are you looking to achieve? It’s easy to be derailed when your goals aren’t reached quickly enough. A great coach defines your goals and breaks them down into small steps so that you can see successes along the way.
ORGANIZED A great coach provides organization & simplification. They help order thoughts and gives a formula for success and help develop a process to achieve whatever you want to accomplish. A great coach customizes the process to align with your needs.
CHALLENGE A great coach identifies challenges. Including ones that you may not even see which can prepare you for a smoother outcome. Remember, you don’t know what you don’t know!
PATH A great coach develops solutions. They help develop a path out of the challenges at hand. A road map that runs interference and provides a clear path to achieve your vision.
EXPECTATIONS A great coach is someone who helps guide expectations. They help you to understand your own expectations which tend to be influenced many times with over optimism. Reasonable expectations with early successes, victories and important milestones reached will take away the discouragement many find while navigating a difficult path.
GROWTH A great coach ensures your growth by challenging you. They move you out of your comfort zone with necessary steps and actions to achieve your goals and create scenarios and opportunities for you to be well rounded.
MEASURE A great coach evaluates your performance. They develop a process that measures your performance. Constantly evaluating your performance with real time feedback gives you the opportunity to learn and trains you to solve your own challenges with a set of effective tools.
ACCOUNTABLE A great coach is an accountability partner. For your self-declared goals, a coach will provide constructive feedback so that you can achieve what you set out to do. You are less likely to hold yourself fully accountable if you don’t share your goals with someone that is a trusted and objective partner.
SUPPORT A great coach is supportive. They are always there for support even when there may not be anyone else that can see, believes in, or supports your vision.

Remember, Coaching is the universal language of change and learning.